Christian Seinfeld (Guest Blogger: Jason Dollar)

Thanks to Brian for allowing me the pleasure of being guest blogger for a few days. Feel My Faith has been a major spot of web encouragement for quite some time, and I, for one, am happy to enjoy the thoughts of a hypochondriac pastor from the hills of Georgia. Have you ever just wondered how Brian’s mind works? How does he see so many of the strange things of life, and talk / write about them in a way that makes people double over in laughter? Here is one of my favorite examples of his humor mechanism:

It was not many mornings later that I caught a Southwest jet to New Orleans. Their motto is, “You’ll like where you sit because you can sit where you like.” I’m not sure that is the Southwest Airlines marquee motto, but it is the last slogan you read on a well placed placard before boarding the plane. I think the idea works for the first 157 people on a 160 passenger plane. Being passenger 158 the slogan becomes, “Please be seated.” (From the blog “Cheerleaders and Nuns”)

He’s like a Christianized version of Seinfeld. He sees the absurdities of life, makes us laugh at them, and then gives us their interpretation from a biblical worldview.

So why am I guest-blogging for the Christian Seinfeld? Because Brian does not like to think too hard when he is at the beach with his family. Or does he? Actually, I recall some of his thoughts about fatherhood from a recent visit to the beach:

The beach makes you realize why men need to be beaten every Father’s Day. At the beach boys are sharks and girls are very attractive to sharks. It is a dad with daughters nightmare. The beach helps you realize that when you are raising daughters you should move to Canada, vacation in Colorado and keep your girls in very thick, heavy jackets for the rest of their lives. The beach helps me realize that the dermatologist is my friend. If I can make quarterly appointments for my daughters with the dermatologist maybe she (my dermatologist is a woman very afraid of the sun) can instill in them a healthy paranoia of melanoma. If I can brainwash my daughters into equating bikinis with ultraviolet suicide I will be a good father. So while at the beach contemplating the rigors of being a good father I did what every healthy, holy male would do in a situation like this. One, I tried to shield my eyes from massive amounts of sun-burning flesh. Two, I began looking around at the other families on the beach and making shallow comparisons of myself to the other dads. (Read the whole post here)

So maybe my job is to keep Brian’s readers busy and distracted so that he can devote his full attention to protecting his daughters from sharks and melanoma, and so that he can take the time to make shallow comparisons between himself and other fathers at the beach. I see my role now.

The Christian Seinfeld did say that I should plug my book on his blog. It is called Contend, and it’s a basic survey of Christian Apologetics on a high school level. It can be read or purchased at my website: If you purchase it, Brian promises that he will come and mow your lawn for you twice, as a sign of appreciation.


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