An Open Letter to the Guy or Gal Who Packages Dolls
Dear doll packaging guy, Did you learn your trade from Houdini? Were you formerly trained by the Department of Homeland Security to restrain terrorists at Guantanamo Bay? Is that how you learned to put Elmo under wraps, by dealing with terrorists? In whatever forum you developed your craft I extend to you kudos because you are the best. Since the birth of my girls I have continually looked forward to helping the doll of choice escape from your shackles. Following a late night of “assembly required” and an early morning awakening by an excited child nothing makes me want to cuss Santa like unwinding one of your death traps. Must every Sesame Street character be removed from its carton with a Phillips head screwdriver? Is it necessary to bind “Baby May I” with a quarter mile of industrial strength metal ribbon? On the side of the box, please print clearly the tools that will be required to unwrap your victim. “Jaws of life and double A batteries” not included. Not that I dou